TEACHER:
Maria, go to the map and find North America.

MARIA:
Here it is.

TEACHER:
Correct. Now class, who discovered America?

CLASS:
Maria.

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TEACHER:
John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?

JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.

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TEACHER:
Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"

GLENN:
K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L

TEACHER:
No, that's wrong.

GLENN:
Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

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TEACHER:
Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?

DONALD:
H I J K L M N O.

TEACHER:
What are you talking about?

DONALD:
Yesterday you said it's H to O.
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TEACHER:
Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.

WINNIE:
Me!
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TEACHER:
Glen, why do you always get so dirty?

GLEN:
Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER:
Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."

MILLIE:
I is.

TEACHER:
No, Millie. Always say, "I am."

MILLIE:
Alright. "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
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TEACHER:
George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?

LOUIS:
Because George still had the axe in his hand.
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TEACHER:
Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

SIMON:
No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
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TEACHER:
Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?

CLYDE:
No, sir. It's the same dog.
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TEACHER:
Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

HAROLD:
A teacher.